Read Ebook: Scally: The Story of a Perfect Gentleman by Hay Ian
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Ebook has 323 lines and 13516 words, and 7 pages
"Wait a minute and I will ask him," I said, starting forward.
But my wife would not hear of it.
"Certainly not," she replied. "If we ask him he will simply offer to show us the way. Then we shall have to talk to him--about hydrophobia, and lethal chambers, and distemper--and it may be for miles. I simply couldn't bear it! We shall have to tip him, too. Let us follow him quietly."
To those who have never attempted to track a fellow creature surreptitiously through the streets of London on a hot day, the feat may appear simple. It is in reality a most exhausting, dilatory, and humiliating exercise. Our difficulty lay not so much in keeping our friend in sight as in avoiding frequent and unexpected collisions with him. The general idea, as they say on field days, was to keep about twenty yards behind him; but under certain circumstances distance has an uncanny habit of annihilating itself. The man himself was no hustler. Once or twice he stopped to light his pipe or converse with a friend.
During these interludes Stella and I loafed guiltily on the pavement, pointing out to one another objects of local interest with the fatuous officiousness of people in the foreground of hotel advertisements. Occasionally he paused to contemplate the contents of a shop window. We gazed industriously into the window next door. Our first window, I recollect, was an undertaker's, with ready-printed expressions of grief for sale on white porcelain disks. We had time to read them all. The next was a butcher's. Here we stayed, perforce, so long that the proprietor, who was of the tribe that disposes of its wares almost entirely by personal canvass, came out into the street and endeavored to sell us a bullock's heart.
Our quarry's next proceeding was to dive into a public house. We turned and surveyed one another.
"What are we to do now?" inquired my wife.
"Go inside, too," I replied with more enthusiasm than I had hitherto displayed. "At least, I think I ought to. You can please yourself."
"I will not be left in the street," said Stella firmly. "We must just wait here together until he comes out."
"There may be another exit," I objected. "We had better go in. I shall take something, just to keep up appearances; and you must sit down in the ladies' bar, or the snug, or whatever they call it."
"Certainly not!" said Stella.
For the first time the man appeared to notice our presence. He regarded us curiously, with a faint gleam of recognition in his eyes, and then set off down the street at a good pace. We followed, panting. Once or twice he looked back over his shoulder a little apprehensively, I thought. But we ploughed on.
"We ought to get there soon at this pace," I gasped. "Hello! He's gone again!"
"He turned down to the right," said Stella excitedly.
The lust of the chase was fairly on us now. We swung eagerly round the corner into a quiet by-street. Our man was nowhere to be seen and the street was almost empty.
"Come on!" said Stella. "He may have turned in somewhere."
We hurried down the street. Suddenly, warned by a newly awakened and primitive instinct, I looked back. We had overrun our quarry. He had just emerged from some hiding place and was heading back toward the main street, looking fearfully over his shoulder. Once more we were in full cry.
For the next five minutes we practically ran--all three of us. The man was obviously frightened out of his wits, and kept making frenzied and spasmodic spurts, from which we surmised that he was getting to the end of his powers of endurance.
"If only we could overtake him," I said, hauling my exhausted spouse along by the arm, "we could explain that--"
"He's gone again!" exclaimed Stella.
"We've got him!" I exclaimed.
I felt as Moltke must have felt when he closed the circle at Sedan.
"But where is the Dogs' Home, dear?" inquired Stella.
The question was never answered, for at this moment the man ran up the steps of the fourth villa on the left and slipped a latchkey into the lock. The door closed behind him with a venomous snap and we were left alone in the street, guideless and dogless.
A minute later the man appeared at the ground-floor window, accompanied by a female of commanding appearance. He pointed us out to her. Behind them we could dimly descry a white tablecloth, a tea cozy and covered dishes.
The commanding female, after a prolonged and withering glare, plucked a hairpin from her head and ostentatiously proceeded to skewer together the starchy white curtains that framed the window. Privacy secured and the sanctity of the English home thus pointedly vindicated, she and her husband disappeared into the murky background, where they doubtless sat down to an excellent high tea. Exhausted and discomfited, we drifted away.
"I am going home," said Stella in a hollow voice. "And I think," she added bitterly, "that it might have occurred to you to suggest that the creature might possibly be going from the Dogs' Home and not to it."
I apologized. It is the simplest plan, really.
IT was almost dark when the train arrived at our little country station. We set out to walk home by the short cut across the golf course.
"Anyhow, we have saved five shillings," remarked Stella.
"We paid half a crown for that taxi which took us back to Victoria Station," I reminded her.
"Do not argue to-night, darling," responded my wife. "I simply cannot endure anything more."
Plainly she was a little unstrung. Very considerately, I selected another topic.
"I think our best plan," I said cheerfully, "would be to advertise for a dog."
"I never wish to see a dog again," replied Stella.
I surveyed her with some concern and said gently:--
"I am afraid you are tired, dear."
"No; I'm not."
"A little shaken, perhaps?"
"Nothing of the kind. Joe, what is that?"
Stella's fingers bit deep into my biceps muscle, causing me considerable pain. We were passing a small sheet of water which guards the thirteenth green on the golf course. It is a stagnant and unclean pool, but we make rather a fuss of it. We call it the pond; and if you play a ball into it you send a blasphemous caddie in after it and count one stroke.
A young moon was struggling up over the trees, dismally illuminating the scene. On the slimy shores of the pond we beheld a small moving object.
A yard behind it was another object, a little smaller, moving at exactly the same pace. One of the objects was emitting sounds of distress.
Abandoning my quaking consort I advanced to the edge of the pond and leaned down to investigate the mystery.
The leading object proved to be a small, wet, shivering, whimpering puppy. The satellite was a brick. The two were connected by a string. The puppy had just emerged from the depths of the pond, towing the brick behind it.
"What is it, dear?" repeated Stella fearfully.
"Your dog!" I replied, and cut the string.
WE spent three days deciding on a name for him. Stella suggested Tiny, on account of his size. I pointed out that time might stultify this selection of a title.
"I don't think so," said Eileen, supporting her sister. "That kind of dog does not grow very big."
"What kind of dog is he?" I inquired swiftly.
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