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Read Ebook: Punch or the London Charivari Vol. 105 December 9 1893 by Various Burnand F C Francis Cowley Editor
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Ebook has 67 lines and 11764 words, and 2 pages
Seated to-day at a concert, I am weary and ill at ease, Though LLOYD and ALBANI are singing, Or anyone else you please; I know not what they are doing, For something is wanting there-- That old-fashioned concert-hall odour Which throbbed in the scented air.
It flooded the place, like one of BEETHOVEN'S sonatas might, And it lay on my fevered spirit With a touch of wild delight; It quieted pain and sorrow, It thrilled the enraptured sense, A song without words--or music-- That travelled one knew not whence; It linked all delightful odours Into one perfect peace, And trembled away into soup-plates As if it were loth to cease.
I have sought--but I seek it vainly-- That one lost smell sublime, Which came from adjacent kitchens At dinner or supper time. It may be that CHOPIN is severed From scents which with music we group, It may be that SCHUBERT is parted For ever from odours of soup.
The Belfry of Bruges Overlooked.
What? Bruges a silent city! Now, nay a thousand times! If deaf, accept our pity; If not,--oh dear! those chimes!
NEW LEGAL WORK. --"The Briefless Junior; or, Plenty of Stuff to Spare."
ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
EXTRACTED FROM THE DIARY OF TOBY, M.P.
During interval when House cleared for division ACLAND, who, having a holiday, has been out helping FOWLER, left Treasury bench; cautiously but nimbly crossed gangway; amid buzz of admiration from assembly that ever admires personal courage, entered the LOGAN'S den. Sat down in very midst of excited Radicals; proposed to argue matter out. Effect upon LOGAN maddening. Windmill remembered another appointment more pressing than the last. Members, anxious for ACLAND'S safety, looked round for HAYES FISHER. The LOGAN Tamer not in his place; sand rapidly running out of glass on table; another minute question would be put again; if LOGAN insisted division must be taken, split manifested in Ministerial ranks, and a quarter of an hour wasted. ACLAND, undaunted, pegged away persuasively; windmill still went round, but less furiously; half a minute and last sands would run out.
LOGAN glanced towards table; Chairman's glittering eye fixed upon him. Effect magical. LOGAN slowly rose and walked towards Bar; crowd thronging in at sound of division bell respectfully opened their ranks as he approached. Like accomplished husband in case that recently occupied attention of Sir FRANCIS JEUNE, LOGAN "can use 'em a bit." Suppose he were to begin promiscuously with the crowd at the Bar! Had no such intention. At other side of the Bar he was technically out of the House. What others did whilst he stood there would leave no sear on his conscience. When question was put again, and Chairman declared "The Ayes have it," there was no responsive angry shout of "No!" The crisis was passed, but what it cost the Chairman, and how it would have been but for ACLAND'S fearless foray, who can tell?
Here another speech, about as long as the distance from Shrewsbury to Wem. Thus an hour pleasantly and agreeably disposed of, MAN FROM SHROPSHIRE takes breath, not that he wants it; a little later, comes up frowning with another Amendment, or a rambling speech in support of one moved by TOMLINSON.
THE MAN FROM SHROPSHIRE audibly smacks his lips over it. The other noise you hear is baffled HENRY FOWLER grinding his teeth.
Expected when Mr. G. rose he would make obvious retort that since Bill has been in Committee there is not single sitting that might not have been shortened by at least an hour if THE MAN FROM SHROPSHIRE had restrained his tendency to irrelevant babble. Mr. G. leaves that unsaid; is very firm about sitting till all necessary business is done; conditionally promises Saturday sitting; announces meeting of Cabinet to consider measures for expediting Bill. After this go into Committee, and succeed in not expediting progress. Night unspeakably dull.
"That," said Mr. G., with an effort recovering himself, "I am not entitled to do." All he had to say was that under present Standing Orders a Saturday Sitting would naturally follow unless a Minister interposed with Motion preventing it. MARJORIBANKS sitting by his side was looking forward anxiously to pleasure of making such a Motion. It would be cruel disappointment to an amiable man if circumstances so shaped themselves as to forbid him the pleasure and gratification of rising on stroke of midnight and moving that House do adjourn till Monday. But--here Mr. G. shook his head and his voice thrilled with infinite pathos--business must be done. If, in short, Committee passed 9th and 10th Clauses of Bill, MARJORIBANKS would move adjournment till Monday. "If unfortunately," he added, "any miscarriage should occur he would not be in a position to make the motion." SQUIRE OF MALWOOD half rose from his seat as if to catch the drooping figure of his right hon. friend overcome with emotion. But Mr. G., waving him off, sank slowly back into his seat and shudderingly closed his eyes, as if to shut out picture of gentlemen opposite spending Saturday in further consideration of Parish Councils Bill. GOSCHEN said it was too large an order. Couldn't possibly be done in the time. But it was.
Transcriber's Note:
Page 265: 'advertisment' corrected to 'advertisement'.
"... a picture which seems to be an advertisement of somebody's shirts?"
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