Read Ebook: The Girl's Own Paper Vol. VIII No. 373 February 19 1887 by Various

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hey are fortunate enough to be able to do so; and in my experience--and depend upon it, girls, it will be yours too, no money is so sweet in the spending as that which is earned.

But few things that are very good, or very pleasant, are to be procured without trouble. Competition is so keen now, that it is no easy matter to make a few pounds, or even a few shillings, without some special talent, or, better still, some special training. Moreover, caution is necessary, or the unwary and inexperienced fall an easy prey to the rogues, ever on the alert to make their want his or her opportunity; for, worse luck, there are female as well as male rogues. One of their most successful modes of proceeding is the insertion of specious advertisements in newspapers.

When one's eyes are open it is easy to wonder how other folks can be so readily taken in--this, by-the-bye, generally after we ourselves have suffered.

Years ago the writer of the following advertisement made quite a large sum, and I daresay you and I think his victims must have been very gullible.

"Music.--An extra opportunity for being instructed in music, either in town or country. The advertiser has found out a method by which he teaches to play on either the piano, violin, or guitar, in the completest manner, by only the practice of one single lesson, which he does on the most reasonable terms."

Imagine anyone thinking they could learn the use of an instrument in a lesson! Yet it is not one whit more absurd than the many employments offered and advertised, "without any previous knowledge being necessary," even if it be merely colouring photographs. I have seen such an announcement with regard to painting on china, a palpable absurdity, for the very nature of the work demands a certain facility in manipulating colours and mediums, even if no skill in drawing be needed, and without this it must be very rudimentary painting indeed.

It is a pretty safe rule that whenever a demand is made for money over and above the value of goods sent, there is a necessity for being on the alert. A rascal used to take in a number of poor women by advertising for ladies to copy sermons at twopence per hundred words. Applicants were, as a preliminary, required to deposit half-a-crown, which was said to be returned if no work was sent, but before that could be done another seven and sixpence was demanded "to avoid any possibility of unscrupulous persons obtaining valuable sermons on pretence of copying." Neither the half-crown nor seven and sixpence were ever returned, and in time the advertiser paid for his ingenuity by twelve months' imprisonment with hard labour.

There is no doubt many women have answered the advertisements which offer to teach a system of dressmaking, or give employment in painting lace, or painting Christmas cards, or turning the use of a knitting-machine to account, and have profited thereby; but you may be quite sure that if these lead to any good results the proceedings did not begin by the applicants being mulcted of shillings, half-crowns, half-sovereigns, or larger sums. Girls, if you want to earn money, draw your purse-strings tight.

I have made many inquiries respecting societies and associations professing to be established with the benevolent object of assisting ladies to dispose of their handiwork, either artistic or needlework, and I have come to the conclusion that, however well such advertisements may read, they are to be accepted with caution. I should advise none of you to send any article or to put down any annual subscription to any such societies unless they have a working committee of people whose names carry weight and issue a properly-audited balance-sheet annually. Many of these sort of things are stated, perhaps without any intention of fraud, but without the power of commanding a sale or sufficient means in the background to find the rent and other expenses, or perhaps lacking the necessary business aptitude on the part of the promoters. They go on for a while, and then too often suddenly collapse. The goods, if returned at all, are mostly much the worse for wear, and, as a matter of course, the entrance fee is sacrificed.

But perhaps some of you girls have literary talents, and desire to publish tales or essays, poems, or whatever else you are able to produce. If so, send them to well-established periodicals or country newspapers. Do not be discouraged by failure. Many a good article rejected over and over again has appeared in print and laid the foundation for a literary career. Let your copy be clear, carefully written on one side of the paper only, and the matter something about which you have some specific knowledge. Few well-established publications need to advertise for contributors, and it certainly is not necessary for you, a tyro in the art, to subscribe towards the publishing of a magazine in which your productions are to appear. Few such publications would have the faintest chance of success under such auspices.

It might, under exceptional circumstances, when needlework is ordered, be necessary to deposit a few shillings as a guarantee that the materials sent to you will be duly returned or paid for; but if your writings require a deposit of any kind to get them read or published, the waste-paper basket is the best place for them, however highly you may yourself value them. Literature, after all, is a very open market, and fresh blood is always needed, though it may be a difficult matter to get your first step on the ladder. "Try, and if you don't succeed, try, try, try again," is the very best advice, but don't subscribe to any association which offers even the most tempting terms to publish in any magazine issued by the joint subscriptions of amateur authors. Nor do not be tempted by offers of introductions to publishers for a consideration. Attack the publishers yourself, without any intermediary. No paid one will help you. I was asked to subscribe to something of the kind not long ago, and among the advantages the subscription was to give me was the power to try for the acrostic and other prizes offered by a well-known weekly paper, which was open to everybody.

If as much ingenuity were employed in securing honest work as we find in these bogus advertisements, the perpetrators, I think, would be much better off. The addresses change so frequently, applicants are so deluged with printed testimonials, that they are the more easily gulled. Sometimes the advertisers are obliged at last to send something in return for the money. One Everett May, for example, who for eighteenpence undertook to teach how to earn four guineas a week. For a time he would declare that the packet was posted, and must have been lost in transit, but after a long correspondence and constant demands for more money, if very hard pressed, something arrived, as, in one case, a last, a small boot for a child, and a few pieces of leather, from which it would be impossible to make a fellow boot, and a note concluding with, "As soon as we receive from you a specimen equal to pattern we shall be glad to afford you constant employment." Another advertisement offered to gentlemen in a respectable circle of acquaintance the means of increasing their incomes, and on receipt of thirty stamps advised the purchase of a cwt. of potatoes for 4s., a basket, and 2s. worth of flannel, to have half the quantity of potatoes baked nightly, put them in the basket well wrapped in flannel, sell them at a 1d. each, and so earn ?2 a week.

Just now the word competitions occupy many advertisements in the newspapers. I counted fourteen different addresses in one number. The amount offered in prizes is tempting, and those of my friends who have competed have found the promoters apparently fair dealing. But it is not easy to obtain a prize, and the shilling paid by each competitor is, I expect, the most important point to the advertiser.

One other class of advertisement I am about to touch upon, viz., the fortune-telling ones. Seeing the penalties the advertisers lay themselves open to, it is wonderful that they appear at all. If any of you send your shilling in the hope of obtaining your horoscope or any revelation as to your future life, based on the information you furnish as to your height, colour of hair, eyes, and date of birth, even supposing you receive any reply at all, you will very surely have wasted your money. None of these folks know any more of your future than The Home Philosopher, and if I could tell the future, I should know what stocks were going to rise, and what horse will win the next Derby, and thereby make more money in a week than the fortune-tellers, if they had ten lives. Depend on it, if they could they would do the same.

ARDERN HOLT.

THE ROMANCE OF THE BANK OF ENGLAND;

OR,

THE OLD LADY OF THREADNEEDLE STREET.

BY EMMA BREWER.

In our last interview you saw me firmly and proudly established in my new home in Threadneedle-street.

It was but a small parish of ninety-two houses at the time of my entering it.

The church was old, for mention is made of it as early as 1368. I cannot give you many particulars about it except that it was rebuilt or renovated in 1462, and that it was slightly injured by the Great Fire in 1666.

It had a certain sort of melancholy interest for me, for it was the burial-place of many who had been my early friends, among others, the Houblon family.

The living, which was in the gift of the bishops of London, was worth only ?120 per annum; not a very rich one, you will say.

To save returning to the subject of this parish again, I will tell you now how it is that at the present moment you see neither church nor churchyard, neither parish nor parishioner of St. Christopher le Stocks.

The increase in my duties and the variety of work put upon me, rendered the size of my house wholly insufficient for the purpose, therefore, from time to time, as opportunity offered, I purchased houses in the parish, power to do so being granted me by Acts of Parliament, and so rapidly were my purchases made that in fifty years from the time of my settling in Threadneedle-street, I owned the whole parish of St. Christopher le Stocks, save and except seven houses on the west side of Princes-street and the church and burial ground. And of the rates and taxes of the parish I paid five-sixths of the whole.

Even with this extension of room I could not get on, and an Act was passed vesting the glebe land and parsonage belonging to the rector of the parish in the governor and directors of the Bank of England.

Nor was this all; I wish it were. The riot of 1780, which I will tell you about a little later, suggested that the church might prove a dangerous fortress for rioters in case of any attack made on my cellars, and after long consultations I and my directors entered into an agreement with the patrons and rector, with the sanction of Government of course, that the church and churchyard should be ours.

On this site, therefore, the west wing of my residence is built, upon a plan designed by Sir Robert Taylor.

I am glad to get over this point in my story, for the demolition of the church caused such pain to those who had friends and relatives buried there, that I would not witness it again for any consideration.

Even at this distance of time, when I look out from my parlour on to the churchyard, which is now full of flowers, and is, in fact, my garden, my conscience is troubled, and I should have been happier if a building devoted to God's service had not been destroyed to increase my domain.

It is a painful subject with me, and so I am sure you will excuse my referring to it when the years come under review in which they took place.

Should any of you wish to see memorials of the Church of St. Christopher, you will find one or two in St. Margaret's, Lothbury, with which parish that of St. Christopher's was united. They consist of two flat figures placed in niches on either side of the altar, and a metal bust inscribed to Petrus le Maire, 1631, which stands at the west end of the church.

And now to go on with my story.

You may not be aware of it, but I have several children of various ages, each with distinct characteristics and purposes, and if you are ever to gain any advantage through your introduction to me it must be by means of one or more of these.

They differ from other people's children in many respects, and yet I would not have them other than they are.

They bear a high character throughout the world, and are, I may say, blindly trusted, for those who place implicit confidence in them know little or nothing of their daily life and character, which are known thoroughly only by their own circle, and would, I think, be puzzled to give a reason for their trust.

They speak a language peculiarly their own, a language which not one in a thousand of their admirers can understand, yet it is one which, with a little attention, might be taught in our public schools with as much ease as French or Latin, and would richly repay the trouble of learning.

The remark of a man known as Captain Cuttle illustrates the want of education I refer to. He says, "I feel bound to read quotations of the funds every day, though I am unable to make out on any principle of navigation what the figures mean, and could very well dispense with the fractions."

An equal ignorance is observable in reference to their servants or bodyguard. A comparatively small number of people know anything of their office and its duties, and it has become the fashion to speak of them with contempt, but I think most unreasonably.

I am no friend to ignorance, and will endeavour, while telling you my story, to throw some light upon these points. If I remember rightly, this will be in accordance with your wish conveyed to me in your introduction.

I do not think it would be easy to find a family whose health is such a matter of public solicitation and anxiety as mine. At rapid intervals during the day their pulse is felt, their temperature tested, the figures registered and posted up to public gaze. No sooner do they meet the eye of the anxious crowd than telegraphs and telephones are set to work to carry the announcement far and wide, and according to the knowledge possessed of these figures fortunes are made and fortunes are lost.

They are, as a rule, healthy children, but unfortunately they are dreadfully sensitive, rushing up madly to high spirits on the slightest of good news, and sinking into a state of depression at the very suggestion of a war or even a change of government. I have known even after-dinner speeches at the Mansion House and Guildhall affect them. Unless the state of their feelings were registered you would almost doubt the possibility of trusted creatures being so uncertain in their disposition.

I know that this morbid sensibility is as bad for my children as for those of any other parent, for do I not see advantage taken of it every day?

When their pulses run up to fever height in the morning there is no knowing how low their purses may be before night, for everyone who has studied their language and understands the state of their health by its means takes the opportunity of coming to them for money. The livelong day the plea is for money, which is never refused while my children have a penny.

Of course I am bound to acknowledge that there is another side to the picture, viz., that whenever through bad news they become so low and depressed that you think it impossible they can rally, help comes, and in a way you would not expect.

People no sooner read the bulletin, "Very low to-day," than they empty their purses, collect their savings, write cheques for their balance at the bankers, and come and lay all at the feet of my children. It is a strange world, and I have a strange family, but so it is.

You might suppose they were my step-children, as they do not bear the family name of Bank or Banks, but you would be wrong in your supposition. They are my very own, their name of Stocks or Funds having been assumed to denote the exact part they play in the world.

We have all experienced that a personal introduction is much more effective than writing, and therefore, without loss of time, permit me to introduce you to my eldest born, Three per Cents. Consols.

Three per Cents. was born in Grocers' Hall in 1731, and was a baby in arms when I moved into Threadneedle-street.

Of this child I could say much. She has never given me uneasiness; on the contrary, she is one of the steadiest and most reliable of my children. She is less liable to high flights and deep depression, and it is in her favour I think that old people, widows and orphans, prefer her to the rest of my family.

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